he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Randomize
