the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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