she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
