Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
