i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
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