so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
