so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Randomize