For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
