so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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