It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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