I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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