He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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