my vag is so smooth its legendary
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize
