Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
