he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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