I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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