mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
