Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
You ruined the universe
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
