pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
