On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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