Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
