super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Randomize