I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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