Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
