is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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