the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
