Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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