eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
