Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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