I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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