You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
