I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
