I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
