You don't have asthma, your pregnant
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize