i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
