Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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