ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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