Me too!
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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