is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
