Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
jump out the window naked night went bad
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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