Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
