Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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