Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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