don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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