just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
