Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I am midnight drunk by noon
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize