Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
he thought i was a dude.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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