Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
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