I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
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