Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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