Its about making memories worth repressing
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
