why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Randomize
